The advice by 11KBW barrister Sean Jones QC — delivered via the #MarriedtotheBar Twitter hashtag — is essential reading for the film star ahead of his wedding to Doughty Street's Amal Alamuddin.
This is amazing...
Dear George some things you should know about being #MarriedToTheBar ...
— Sean Jones (@seanjones11kbw) April 28, 2014
1.
Get used to being criticised in numbered sub-points #MarriedtotheBar
— Sean Jones (@seanjones11kbw) April 28, 2014
2.
The Hallway is for Rolling Luggage, the stairs for dead papers #MarriedtotheBar
— Sean Jones (@seanjones11kbw) April 28, 2014
3.
Of course she loves you more than the job bt she HAS to get these submissions finished so cld you go on your own this time? #MarriedtotheBar
— Sean Jones (@seanjones11kbw) April 28, 2014
4.
If you find a random DVD enclosed with her instructions never ever watch it. #MarriedtotheBar
— Sean Jones (@seanjones11kbw) April 28, 2014
5.
Do not borrow highlighter pens or Post It notes without permission and NEVER touch her hole punch #MarriedtotheBar
— Sean Jones (@seanjones11kbw) April 28, 2014
6.
Nothing spices up an otherwise trivial domestic row like being cross-examined relentlessly #MarriedtotheBar
— Sean Jones (@seanjones11kbw) April 28, 2014
7.
The Beatles did not write the White Book #MarriedtotheBAr
— Sean Jones (@seanjones11kbw) April 28, 2014
8.
You probably have not appreciated how often your opinions have involved non-sequiturs - you soon will #MarriedtotheBar
— Sean Jones (@seanjones11kbw) April 28, 2014
9.
If she is describing how a judge disagreed with her, but you think the judge had a point - keep that to yourself #MarriedtotheBar
— Sean Jones (@seanjones11kbw) April 28, 2014
10.
That thing you said, but didn't mean, and have forgotten. A barrister never forgets. #MarriedtottheBar
— Sean Jones (@seanjones11kbw) April 28, 2014
11.
Some of her male friends wear silk stockings, shorts and patent leather shoes with buckles. Act like that is normal #MarriedtotheBar
— Sean Jones (@seanjones11kbw) April 28, 2014
12.
Never ever use "Grayling" as your safe word #MarriedtotheBar
— Sean Jones (@seanjones11kbw) April 28, 2014
13.
Probably best to learn the difference between "infer" and "imply" immediately - it will save you pain in the long run. #MarriedtotheBar
— Sean Jones (@seanjones11kbw) April 28, 2014
14.
Your briefs are likely to be less impressive than hers #MarriedtotheBar
— Sean Jones (@seanjones11kbw) April 28, 2014
Just don't tell Jones's wife about the tips...
Can't help but feel that however grateful George Clooney may be for the advice, if Penny finds out about #MarriedtotheBar I'm a dead man
— Sean Jones (@seanjones11kbw) April 29, 2014